My Parenting Awesomeness Knows No Bounds!

Me to teenage son = "You need to turn your music down at night... there is no reason to have it that loud."

Teenage son to me = "You need to have quieter sex at night mom... there is no reason to make so much noise."

Me to teenage son = "Rock On Dude!"

The Hardest Job in the World Ever, with a side of whine.

I have had many jobs and worn many hats in my life.

I scooped ice cream at Baskin Robbins.
I was a hostess at Golden Corral.
I waited tables in a Texas steakhouse.
I managed a sports bar.
I trained waitstaff for an upscale hotel.
I worked in the ER.
I worked on a ambulance.
I was a bartender, a cocktail waitress, a day care worker.

I've sold insurance.
I've sold advertising.
I worked in a psychiatric hospital.
I owned an elder care company.
I've worked the farmers market, in an auto repair shop, sold on eBay, craft shows & flea markets.

And even with all these jobs, I was only fired once in my life.
That's another story for another day,
But it had nothing do do with me or my job performance.

I now hold the most difficult and challenging job title in the world...

Step-Mom.

Being a mother is hard enough, but throw that little "step" word in front of it and it becomes 100 times more difficult.

Let me start by saying that I love all of our kids as if I carried them each in my womb.
They all live with us 100% of the time.
They all have the same rules,
same consequences, same expectations & same affection.

I don't introduce my brood by saying "Bob, George, Spot & Frank & Suzy are mine, But Fred? Well, Fred is my step-son."

I don't see them that way.
I love them all the same.
I treat them all the same.

Or so I thought...

When I am dealing with my natural-born children,
I am the be-all end-all.
I am Mom.
Period.
Right or wrong, perfect of not, that's the way it is, so you better just learn to deal with it.
It is black and white.
Right or wrong.
Yes or no.

Being a step-parent is full of gray, full of self-doubt, full of questioning.
I may be far from perfect,
but I am a very confident mother.
I am, however, the total opposite as a step-mom.

I don't let it show... they can smell fear and doubt ya know!
But.

I'm always being mindful that it doesn't appear (to him OR the other children) that I am treating him different.

If he gets into trouble and I discipline him, does he think I'm harder on him than the other kids because he is not "mine"?
If he doesn't get into too much trouble, do the other kids think I am showing him favoritism because he's not "mine"?

Just this past week.... being a head-strong, attitude-filled, cocky, testosterone-filled teenager, he said something very disrespectful and nasty to me.

I was shocked,
I was angry,
I was hurt.

If my natural-born, head-strong, attitude-filled, cocky, testosterone-filled teenager had said it, I would have, without hesitation, smacked his mouth clean off of his face!!

But, with my step-son, I did not.
I gave him a VERY large piece of my mind.
He was disciplined and punished.
His father threatened great bodily harm if it every happened again.
And then he scolded me for not knocking his block off.
(His father is working out of state, so this is done by phone.)

I'm not sure why it is different, but it IS different.
His natural mother is not involved in his life, so it's not that.
I am not new, I've been in his life for a long time. So I don't think that's it.

He is a good kid.
He, as most teenage boys, gets stupid and mouthy at times. But nothing more than is "normal".
It isn't that he is more of a problem than my natural-born son.

It's just different.
I pride myself in my confidence... or at least the appearance of confidence.

I hate feeling so unsure of my every move!
And the worst part is....
I'm doing it to myself!

I don't know if it can change, or if it ever will change.
I don't know if all step-parents feel this way,
Or if I just suck.

Isn't there a Step-parenting for Idiots book out there??
If so, please send me a copy. STAT!!

Thanks for listening/reading my whine-fest.
It's just one of those weeks, I guess...
It'll get better someday.... RIGHT???

*tap* *tap* *tap* Is this thing on??

Confessions of a Bad Baseball Mom

I have a confession to make...

Yep, it's sad, but true.
I'm a baseball Mom.
And I'm NOT good at it.

This year, The Little-Foreman-in-Pink (5)
and Worker #4 (9) are playing baseball.

This makes me a ...
running between practices 6 days a week,
attending a combined 6-8 games a week,
Filling the Water Bottles,
Slathering the Sun screen,
Spritzing the Bug Spray,
sore palms from clapping,
cracking voice from cheering,
Baseball Mom.

Now, don't get me wrong... I said I am a Baseball Mom...
I never said I was a good one!

Opening Day and the first games of the season were last week-end.
I was all excited to watch my little ones play.
The 4-5 year old T-Ball game was first.

We got there in plenty of time.
The little girls were SO cute with their over-sized pink batting helmets and face guards.
I waited for my little redhead to make her way to the plate.
She took her stance, and prepared to swing the bat.

Something came over me.
I jumped out of my seat and started yelling...
"Go Clover!!!, Hit it hard!!, Bring 'em Home!! Whoo Hoo!!'
She swung the bat, hitting the T and NOT the ball.
"That's ok Clover! You'll get it next time!! Keep your eye on the ball baby!"

Then I I heard a little voice...
"Mommy?...
Why are you yelling to Brittany? I'm your girl. I'm over here!"
Oops! I sat down and shut up.

Then it was worker #4's game.
He is 9, 9 yr old games are intense man!

The other baseball moms are Hard Core!
They all have team shirts with their kids names and numbers embroidered on the back saying things like.. "Brandon's Mom" or "Jimmy's Mom".

They all have their matching folding chairs,
Full make up,
Pom-poms,
Orange slices to give to their player.
Not a hair is out of out of place.
They know their cheers.
They have their seats saved with special bleacher chair thingies.

I, however, am lucky I remembered to brush my teeth before I rushed out the door to get to the ball park on time!

It's gonna be a Looong season!