October 14, 2008

Not very nice.

I used to think I was a nice person.
Most people like me.
I can get along with most anyone.
I am pretty non-judgmental.
I love children.
I love animals.

I sound like a pretty damn nice person right?

I was sitting in the Mall the other day letting my youngest fruit from my loins ride up and down the escalator 700 times, people watching.
I love people watching...
People are fun to watch.
My thoughts sounded something like this....

Oooh she has cute boots on! I want some boots like that!
But my stupid calves are way too fat to pull em off... the skinny hag!

Oh my... those children are homely. Have you noticed how ugly children are getting? I am lucky my children are not that ugly.....
it's all a game of numbers, more ugly children = more ugly adults.
Those ugly adults will breed then well just be the country full of people who look like extras from that Deliverance movie!! Oh dear!

I wonder if that poor woman knows that those short belly-button showing tank tops are NOT made for people with bodies like ours?

If my daughter went out of the house looking like that I'd KILL her!!.. well, I'd smack her silly, THEN kill her.

I bet he beats his wife.

Pull up your pants!

Wow that perfume is strong.... smells like a whore house!

Too much make-up.

Pluck your eyebrows darling.

etc etc etc

Now..... Keep in mind that I am fully aware that I am nowhere near perfect....
And yet, I found myself internally thrashing these people while they walked by.

I am not that nice of a person....
But you don't know that!

are you?


dhw said...

OMG!!! Your Rock, we must of been sisters in another world. I also have a 16 year old son with a new chicky pooh who lives in another town. We've had the talk, but I think I was a little too late on that one....

EmmyRedneck said...

I think we all do that, hon.
I am overweight, I have a big head, my once pretty hair dye job has since turned into a nasty bronzy gold color, I have hooker roots to boot, and I have acne. The list goes on...
But I am still quick to judge people. Especially in malls. I can rattle off a person's entire life when I look at them, and probably not even be close.
But be advised.. Never judge a book by its cover. :o)

Tatersmama said...

WHY had I forgotten that you had this other blog? WHY?
I needed a good laugh this morning - and this was amost as good as looking in the mirror. Well, it actually WAS like looking in the mirror!

Wendy said...

I love this post and have shared it with my mom and best friend. We are like yep, that is us...not that we should but we do. It is nice to know that we are not alone and at least you are open about it!