April 23, 2009

How To Study Like a 16 Year Old Boy.

How To Study For a Test.
Like a 16 year old boy.

1.) Walk into the house and loudly announce "I have a BIG test tomorrow. I will be studying all evening. No time for chores."

2.) Stomp loudly when you are walking to the door to feed the animals because your horrible mother told you to do the chores anyway.
**Be sure to mutter something about it being her fault if you fail the test, can't get into a good college, can't get a good job to make money, and HER grandchildren have to live under a bridge, before you close the door.**

3.) Come in from doing your chores, plop down on the couch and flip on the TV.

4.) Practice your deep breathing so you can perform the worlds longest & loudest sigh when your wicked mother reminds you that you said you needed to study.

5.) Gather up your books and go into your room and sit at your desk to study.

6.) Go into the kitchen to get a drink.

7.) Return to your desk to study.

8.) Go to the bathroom and stay in there for 112 minutes doing God-knows-what.

9.) Return to your desk to study.

10.) Decide it is too quiet and turn on the radio.

11.) Go into the kitchen to get another drink.

12.) Return to your desk to study .

13.) Open your notebook to find a note from your girlfriend, read it 7 times and smell it 16 times.

14.) Go to the bathroom and stay in there for 73 minutes doing God-knows-what.

15.) Return to your desk to study.

16.) Flip through all 97 radio stations looking for one that is playing a song you like.

17.) Preform an amazing air guitar solo and bow to your invisible fans.

18.) Dig in your backpack looking for a pencil.

19.) Go into your brothers room to ask to borrow a pencil.

20.) Put your brother into a sleeper hold and make a bet that he can't get loose from your Grip-of-Death before passing out, squeeze him so hard that he farts.
Run out of his room before the cloud of gas kills you, making sure to knock at least two pictures off of the wall in the hallway as you fly by.

21.) Return to your desk to study.

22.) Open your text book.

23.) Go to the dining room and eat dinner... twice.

24.) Return to your desk to study.

25.) Announce that your eyes are getting tired, and hop into the shower.

26.) Return to your desk to study.

27.) Go into the kitchen for a drink.

28.) Return to your desk to study.

29.) Text your girlfriend 62 text messages.

30.) Play the drums along with your favorite song on the radio using the 2 pencils you stole from your btother for drum sticks.

31.) Turn off the light and go to sleep.

I wonder how they'll do on the test tomorrow??
I'll keep ya posted.

9 comments:

Bethany said...

Hmmmm....I wonder if his mother has ANY personal experience???

Laurie said...

You have documented it perfectly! Perfectly! LOL! I so remember those days.

Anonymous said...

lol That's to funny! You seem to have this routine down to an art! :)

Megan said...

lol That's to funny! You seem to have this routine down to an art! :)

marathoner81 said...

My son is 8, so I guess this is what I have to look forward too...thanks for the heads-up!

Anonymous said...

LOL let me just say.....as a college student, our study habits dont change a bit. our friends come into our dorm rooms and we just find things to do for a longer period of time because the reality is we have set up our classes so they dont start until 11 or 12 the next day anyways. LOL

itsahumanzoo said...

You know, I never really studied anyway. As long as they pay attention in class (I hope they do!) they will do fine on tests.

Bethany said...

@itsahumanzoo As their aunt, I can tell you THEY DON'T. I was the same way, but both worker #1 and #2 need all the help they can get!

Sab said...

haha... sounds like my brother... I wasn't like that... ;)